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breakfast, casual, coffee, food and wine, kangaroo point, price, restaurants and cafes, suburbs, under $10, under $20

NOT: The Cliffs Cafe – 3 River Terrace, Kangaroo Point.

I’m forever going on about my penchant for Saturday morning coffee and breakfast after a cruisy run around the river and city surrounds; there’ s nothing more satisfying than throwing down a million calories in bacon and eggs after having spent an hour trying the burn off the ones from the beers the night before.  As such, it’s with disappointment and a discontended tummy that I award this NOT to the Cliffs Cafe. 

The Cliffs Cafe has the best real estate in town and with the increasing number of fitness freaks around the Kangaroo Point area these days, they’ve pretty much got a license to print money on a Saturday morning.

Princess and I struggled to find a seat as we puffed our way to the Cliffs Cafe, following our trek up the cliff stairs.  In recent weeks as the weather has warmed, the Cliffs Cafe owners have had to upsize their seating and tables to cater for the growing masses.  Unfortunately it doesn’t look like they’ve been able to upsize their staff numbers accordingly.

The Cliffs Cafe don’t offer table service; you order at the counter.  No big deal, except on this occassion the queue was 10 deep and moving very slowly.  I sat at the only table available while Princess waited in line for about 10 minutes.  Our table was covered in left over meals and coffee cups from the patrons before us.  When Princess finally returned after ordering, she mentioned the waitress had grunted at her when she requested someone attend to clearing our table at their convenience.

Five minutes has passed and we weren’t able to get a clean glass for water, let a lone the table cleared.  Sick of the sight of old scrambled eggs and flies buzzing around the cold bacon scraps, I got up and cleared it myself, hoping that one of the waitresses (who had buzzed past empty handed several times) would notice that I was attending to someone else’s job.

I did a great job of stacking the plates, cups, napkins and cutlery – but my efforts thus far went un-noticed, so I pushed the big pile into the centre of the table in the hope that someone would notice the growing mountain of precariously perched china.  In no time at all, we were approached by a waitress – however she had our meals and not a clean cloth.  Embarassed and not knowing what to do first (she had nowhere to put our meals afterall), she apologised and helped us balance our meals while trying to remove some of the mess.

Onto the food – Princess and I are pretty simple creatures when it comes to breakfast; eggs, bacon, tomato and toast is as tricky as it gets.  Unfortunately the poached eggs were rock hard, cold and tasteless and I can’t help but suspect there was a big pot of water in the kitchen poaching eggs en mass and not fresh upon request.  There was nothing gooey and delicious about them at all.

The bacon was fatty and undercooked – enough said.  The tomato was lovely, although having to pay an additional $3.50 for a side of tomato left a bitter taste in my mouth – on top of the $11.50 it cost for the fatty bacon, bullet hard eggs and soggy thick toast.

The Cliffs Cafe has left me disheartened and disappointed – for their sake I hope they find some switched-on staff and tighten up their processes to cater for the crowds – they’ve got the hottest spot in town and it’d be great to see them provide a casual dining experience to match it.

  • The Ciffs Cafe – 3 River Terrace, Kangaroo Point +61 7 3391 7771
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  1. Great review.
    I agree with the review 100%,I went there not too long ago and It was just silly how long I had to wait, and how disorganised the place seems to be when it’s busy.
    Get some more staff to handle it better.

    Posted by Fabian Germies | December 11, 2010, 2:02 pm
  2. Thanks for your comments Fabian. Let’s hope they sort their staffing issues out before too long…

    Posted by CazM | December 13, 2010, 3:29 pm
  3. Totally agree with you there Fabian and Cazm. This cafe has a brilliant spot, but totally spoilt by deplorable food and poor staffing.

    Posted by MIcheal Corleone | December 16, 2010, 9:21 pm

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